The Fog

While reading the first couple of pages of "One Flew Over the Cuckoo´s Nest" many questions arose in my mind. Many things that were being said in the book were not clear. For example, why "Chief" is in that hospital? How crazy is he? Why he never speaks in the book, and just narrates it? Should I believe everything that he is saying? How literal should I take what is being said? When I got to the part of where the Chief talks about the fog I started having even more questions. What does this fog mean?

"They start the machine again and it´s snowing down cold and white all over me like skim milk, so thick I might even be able to hide in it if they didn´t have a hold on me." pg (7)  Thinking about fog,  reminds me of a scary place, or somewhere I do not feel comfortable in. That is how I felt while reading these first pages. Things that are said are not clear, it is all foggy. Maybe that is what Ken Kesey is trying to do. Make the reader feel as the Chief is feeling, confused, scared. The fog can be various things, it can also be something that is showing how scared the Chief is, or as said in the quote it is a place where he can "hide" from the people that he does not like, such as the Big Nurse. The fog can sometimes be something that is keeping us from seeing things. There are times where this can be a good or bad thing. In this case it is bad for the reader because I do not know what is going on, but it can also work as a shield for the Chief. He may not want to confront the Big Nurse, or he does not want to share some information with us. The point is that along the novel I will be finding out what this fog means, and hopefully answers to my questions. 

While reading he does seem to be crazy, but until what extent can that word mean? Am I crazy by questioning what is happening in the book or am I doing it right? Will the fog ever go away? I hope so. 

The Boots

In the first scene of the film “Waiting for Godot”, Estragon is struggling to take of his boot. As we have discussed in class, this play must not be taken literally. Everything that happens is a metaphor such as Godot, whom can be seen as God. He is a person that we are always waiting for and although he may not come we do what Gogo and Didi do, wait. We wait for the hope of something to brighten our day.

When watching this scene I wondered what the boot of Estragon meant? Why did he always have those boots on, even though it made his feet hurt? Why were they  so hard to take off? The answer is, because that is life. We are attached to things that make us suffer because somehow there is something that we like about it. Estragon might enjoy seeing his shiny boots, or maybe he just doesn’t want to go around barefoot. But at the end of the day he is always struggling to take them off. That is when Vladimir comes and helps him take them off. Vladimir is a representation of the people that help us pass through hard times. He is the support that we receive when “the boot is stuck”. These type of people never get tired of helping the person even though it is something repetitive like in the case of Vladimir and Estragon.  “So there you are again”, Vladimir tells Estragon when he sees him struggling with his boot. Immediately he goes running towards to help him. Those are the kind of people we need in this world. People who are not going to give up on you, but rather help you when it is needed.

This reminds me of a time when my cousin had a girlfriend. This cousin of mine is as if he was my brother, we are very close. One year ago he came very excited and told me that he had a girlfriend. He was extremely happy, the smile would not come out of his face. As some time went by, I realized that this girl didn’t treat my cousin how he deserved to be treated. She started to become the person who always said what had to be done, and Alejandro would be the one suffering. She didn’t mind because she knew that Alejandro would still stay with her. One day he had had enough, and stood up for himself by braking up with her. He was full with tears and couldn’t believe what had happened. I would go to his house, take him to the movies, and help him take of that boot. But he didn’t take it off for long. Two weeks later she was back in the family. It wasn’t long for them to brake up again, and then get together once more. This was something that happened around four times. All of the times Alejandro was devastated but I was Estragon whom was always there for him. Right now they aren’t together, but who knows when he will put on that boot once again.  

Wait?

After reading "Waiting for Godot" by Samuel Becket I realized what for me is a good book and what isn't. As I started reading I didn't quite understand the purpose of these two men always fighting but loving each other at the same time. A total love hate relationship, but they didn't really get anywhere. 

Something that caught my eye is that although I didn't enjoy at all this book, Becket was able to make me feel as if I was also waiting for Godot with Estragon and Vladamir. I was a part of the novel too, which is what I find that made me get so frustrated sometimes with the book, because Godot would never show up.Good job Becket. As I was getting to the end of the book I find that its all a cycle and that Godot is never going to get there. Its just like somethings in life. We are waiting for something that we really want but deep down we know that its really never going to happen but somehow we keep on waiting, for someone or something. For example, "Estragon: Well shall we go? Vladamir: Yes, let's go. They do not move." Pg. 103

This reminds me of the time when I was little and I really liked a boy. I knew that he didn't like me, but inside of me there was a little bit of hope that he would call. I don't know why I was so dumb to believe this because deep down I knew that he wasn't going to show up. I guess many things in life are like this. We get dissapointed in someone or something but we still hang in there. I don't know how or when I stopped to think about when he would show up, I guess it just happens but you can't really say "I'm going to stop waiting" because in your subconcious you are still waiting until suddenly you are free. The chains are suddenly broken and you can walk away. One is free from disappointment, and you gained some respect for yourself. But again, if I was able to walk away when were Estragon and Vladamir going to have some respect for themselves? Or maybe I am mistaken and there are times when we should just wait, and even if we die others will wait too. Just like in religion. In some religions such as Judaism people are still waiting for God to come, and they have waited for thousands of years, but they don´t give up. What is the purpose of all this? Well I call it hope. Hope that someday this will happen because without hope where would we be in life? Nowhere. 

I realized that Bekket and Camus have something in common. They both leave out very important things about the novel and I don't understand the purpose of it. I guess its to make the book more intriguing but I just find that irritating. Why was it so important to wait for Godot? Who was Godot anyway?

"We"??

We are alone. The term "we" is often used in society, but really is it "we" who does everything? Isn't it sometimes just an excuse to blame everyone for something but really when it is something possitive we like to take the credit for it, as in "I". Or for instance, "we" may also be used for phrases such as "we are alone." Somebody in the world had to come up with that, but for them to not seem as radical, or weird they take as if the whole world agreed to it. The truth is, is that its false.

While reading the stranger I got the feel that Mr. Meursalt does feel that he is alone, but that he never uses the term "we". He only thinks about himself, not about others or his affect on others, he only lives the moment as in "I". Mr. Muersalt seems to feel as if he didn't belong in the society that he is in, although he doesn't state that directlly in the text one gets the impression because of his actions. For example while he was in his mothers funeral he didn't really understand why people were crying, rather he was irritated by it. Or when Marie proposes to him he doesn't really care nor does he seem excited about it. He kills a person with no real argument and then doesn't know how to defend himself. He might say "we" because even though he knows he is a stranger he might not want to feel as such, or maybe because he feels as an outcast he will try to grap a nonexistant support and bring it to his life, which would be the "we".

There are moments in which one may feel alone, nevertheless we are never alone. If one wishes to be alone, that person can be physically lonesome but I believe that there are more powerfull forses that watch over us and protect us from that lonesome. Although there are moments when I believe that this isn't true, life has shown me that God has always protected me and that because of that I should protect others. Although one may feel that one is alone, there are million of other people that feel this way, meaning that you are never alone. Many people feel the same as "you" so that would turn into "we". Looking back to the phrase "we are alone" it is contradictory due to the fact that if one is with other people as in "we", we are always accompanied.

People may decide to want to push people away, or see life as in an existentialist point of view but I believe that at the end of the day noone wants to feel alone. Even Mersault, who I believed was a person that always wanted to push away others around him when he was going to be executed he said he would of liked to have been accompanied. "For everything to be consummated, for me to feel less alone, I had only to with that there be a large crowd of spectators the day of my execution and that they greet me with cries of hate". (Pg 123)