Not Yesterday, Not Tomorrow

Existentialism. That is a word that I have heard various times but not until yesterday was when I understood the meaning. There isn't a concrete definition of existentialism which is what confuses me. Nevertheless, little by little I start to understand what its followers try to practice. It is to live the moment, to not think about tommorow or yesterday because that doesn't matter. This seems ubsurd to me because I do everything in terms of thinking about my future. Even unconciouslly. For example, taking a specific class because it will help me in University. Or even about the simplest things, such as eating an Ice cream. I start to think, if I eat it will I gain wait or does that actually really matter? According to existentialism it doesn't. "Immediate experiences are all we have." It is difficult for me to follow these beliefs, although it would make life easier.

It certainlly makes life easier for Mr. Meursalt. Something shocking happens to him and he doesn't seem to care. He just faces it at the moment and then stops worrying about it, as if it were a checklist. For example the death of his mother. "Maman died today. Or yesterday maybe, I don't know... I'll take the two o'clock bus and get there in the afternoon. That way I can be there for the vigil and come back tommorow." (Pg. 3) "It occured to me that anyway one more Sunday was over, that Maman was buried now, that I was going back to work, and that, nothing had changed." (Pg. 24) How can Mr. Meursalt say this? Doesn't he realize that his mother passed away? That he will never see her again? That whatever he wanted to tell her and didn't, isn't going to matter now because she is never going to hear it? He must be an existentialist. He only lives the moment and that is it. As if his mothers death was just something that happened, which he would have to face it one day and then immediatelly turn the page. The death of a loved one impacts a person, and it is hard to get over. But Mr. Meursalt gives the impression of not really caring because "nothing had changed." Also when looking at the tone and the pace that Camus writes the book, is very fast. He is talking about Mrs. Meursalt's death, and suddenlly starts talking about how Mr. Meursalt went to dinner at Celeste's. Another example of why Camus is an existantalist is when Marie propossed to him. "That evening Marie came by to see me and asked me if I wanted to marry her. I said it didn't make any difference to me and that we could if she wanted to." (Pg.41) Getting married should be one of the most exciting things that one goes through. Finding the person you love and hoping that you will be together forever sounds pretty good to me. But to Mr. Muersalt "it doesn't really make a difference." Its the same thing as if it didn't matter to him. He has a wonderfull women infront of him, and he doesn't realize, or he just doesn't care. He lives everything by the moment and doesn't think about his future. He never wonders if his actions will have consequences. Mr. Meursalt is an existentialist. He doesn't think that if he treats Marie like that, she will walk away.

Although this way of seeing life is hard for me to understand I believe that it would make life easier and less stresfull. Not thinkign about the future and just doing the things you want because you feel like it. Not because its the right thing to do. Getting over hard times wouldn't seem that difficult and a new day would always be new. It wouldn't be a follow up of the day before. It is very interesting to see how Mr. Meursalt's life turns out by being this way and comparing it to my own.